On Rudeness

Most of the time, in my normal day to day life, I try to be polite and civilized. I often fail at this, not having much experience in the social graces part of life which is normally a part of your childhood. When I first was thrown into the real world in my late teens, I went from never having been able to say what I thought to being able to say anything I thought, and this led somewhat predictably to bad situations. Twice I provoked people intentionally to the point that they drew a knife on me. Not excusing what they did, but I sort of was asking for it.

I tended to be quite overbearingly rude in those early years. I was rude when being rude was not in any way helpful or necessary or even smart. To be fair to me, I had been told by my parents repeatedly that they wanted me to die an excruciating and horrific death, which had not really prepared me for interactions with others.

In the years since, I have found that being rude does have a time and a place. A bad situation in which to be rude is when you are working with someone, or if that person is helping you in some way. If what you need done in any way depends on another person, being rude to that person will probably result in them not helping you, so it's best to be civil.

On the other hand, there are situations where a person is doing something that is actually impeding the normal processes of something that either you are trying to do or society as a whole needs done. Examples of this are driving a slow-moving tractor down a busy highway or standing in the way of equal rights. I have found that rudeness, in this situation, often produces good results. When disagreeing with someone, I have tried the cool, logical, facts-based approach, but I find it is usually much more helpful and satisfying to let someone know that I have no respect for their opinions by saying something like, "You are wrong, and you are immoral if you think that, because no sane, moral person could hold views like that. The only reason you are promoting this is because you are a shit stain on the ass wipe of humanity." If this exchange is happening on a public forum, I usually provide a few facts in case anyone else is wondering why the person is wrong.

This sort of vitriolic response makes people angry, and they will usually either stop talking to you or start to change their stance on the issue. Either result is more desirable than continuing a dead-end conversation where you will not be able to change their mind, no matter how many facts you show them. Of course, this can be dangerous, so it is advisable not to do something like this if the other person is in the position to harm you, in general, although their are situations where risking injury is justified because the cause is more important than your personal well-being. The needs of the many outweigh the needs--but not the rights--of the few, as a general rule.